3 Ways To Control Your Sexual Desire Before it Controls You

3 Ways To Control Your Sexual Desire Before it Controls YouPremarital sex or other sexual related issues can’t come into play when there’s no desire for it. Hence, a little desire can ignite the main act when it’s well nursed.

There’s a desire in everyone that longs for sexual intimacy with the opposite sex, whether you’re spiritually minded or carnally minded. How strong the desire is, it’s a function of what you do to it or the kind of heart you have.
Just like a tap of water that’s connected to the main supply, without the valve, there won’t be control to the outflow of water. The same happens to your sexual desire. Sexual desire is normal and it’s not absurd that you desire to have sex because you’re human except you’re the type that’s born an eunuch or with a zero libido for sex. God created sex, sexual desire and He also kept a ‘valve’ in you to control it.

However, due to the inability to control sexual desire especially at puberty years and afterwards, many had ruin their lives with sexual sins (pornography, premarital sex, masturbation, lustful thoughts). Yet, they have become slaves to their desire. Moreover, the desire you fail to tame will enslave you. How can you control your desire when your hormones says go or when the drive becomes so strong?

1. Don’t follow the direction of your erection or emotions

There’s a direction that every desire tends to lead people in life. And since it’s produced in the mind, it activates a man’s erection making him to act in line with it, especially when he’s a weakling.

Similarly, an intense desire or pressure would make a lady follow her emotions to the place where her sexual dignity will be destroyed. She’ll be head over heels in love with the man that would ruin her life even when it’s glaring but due to the enslavement of her emotions, she’ll follow suit.

Don’t think in the direction of your erection or emotions when a sexual desire is ignited in you because you’ll destroy what you may not have the capacity to repair. When sexual thoughts comes, don’t brood over it but think on what is pure, godly and of good report.

It may sound difficult to do but more destructive if you do it.

2. Learn to say NO

It’s one thing to say no, it’s another thing to say it and mean it. Many try to say no but their thoughts or deeds are yearning for a yes.
You can’t overcome sexual sin if you say yes to your sexual desire. You need to learn to say an affirmative no and walk your talk. Saying it would prevent you from exposing your life to the consequences of saying yes.

Say no to temptation and all appearance of evil that many ignite sexual desire in you. Know when to turn off the movies that stimulate sexual desires in you. Avoid novels that create sexual fantasies and the sites that throws porn at your face.

Say no to friends that intimidates or negatively influence so that your story won’t be like Amnon and Tamar in the Bible. Saying no doesn’t make you a fool or a weakling, it only prevents you from ruining your life and precious destiny.

3. Cultivate a life of principle

He that fails to live by the rules will be ruled by the circumstances of life. Many people are yet to cultivate a life of principle this is why everything goes well for them, especially the bad ones.
Live a principled life that shuns pleasure or denies the destructive ones. What you tolerate the most has more effect over your life if you give in to it. Does your sexual desire own you or you can control it?

4. Consider the timing

What would happen to your life when you implement the desire at the wrong time? Have you thought about it? It is safer to lower your gaze for better days than to fix your gaze, act upon it and destroy the better days ahead. There’s time having sex is better – when you desire it with your better half. But when you fail to consider the timing and you carry out what you desire, you’ll destroy your life before the right time comes.

To control your sexual desire, stay clear of friends that are negative influence. Walk your talk – you can’t overcome when you are taking solace on the laps of Delilah or you’re a Potiphar’s wife. Be disciplined. And don’t follow the direction of your desire (thought).

Having a desire for sex is normal but abnormal when you allow your desire to determine your actions in life.

As a lady, not just an ordinary one. WHAT IS YOUR WORTH?
ARE YOU SO CHEAP FOR GUYS?
DO YOU HAVE ANY PRIDE, AND ARE YOU GUIDING IT?
Give your answers..........,,,,,,,,

Once you miss GOD"S purpose for you in MARRIAGE, to enjoy HEAVEN on earth will be very difficult

Ladies – What Would It Cost A Man To Get You?

By Mayowa Adeniyi

Marrying a rich man is not a license to a 'rich' marriage. Look beyond the physical and let God guide you otherwise you'd trade your happiness for riches. I do not say you should marry a poor man but look beyond the money a man has.

For every goods and services that is bought or rendered, there’s always a price tag. The price tag placed on an item describes the worth and value to which it carries.

There’s a price tag on every woman you tend to find. When I mean price tag, it simply means what it would cost a man to find them, either for serious relationship or not. Do not forget that a man does the finding of a spouse and not the other way round, you’ll become to cheap to source for a man yourself.

Proverbs 31:10 talks about how priceless is it to find a virtuous woman but today, most ladies are easy to get once a man knows how to get into their heart.

Some ladies are cheap to get, some fairly expensive or very expensive. The cheap ones are gotten through ‘cheap’ means and the expensive ones made themselves so through their adornment and external features. But the price of a virtuous woman is far above rubies. It takes a man, I mean a man to pay the price in finding her.
Dear ladies, what would it cost a man to find you for a serious relationship? The following points are usually the price tag placed on most ladies.

1. Money

It’s often said that ladies love money, I don’t know how true this is but oftentimes a large number of the female folks loves to marry rich men or those who are already made.

If you love money and the things that it can afford extremely and it determines your choice of selecting a man to marry, it only shows how covetous you are and a liability in the making.
When you turn down a man’s proposal because he’s not rich or well-to-do as you do, you’ll end up missing the one God meant for you. A man that’s not too financially buoyant who’s God’s will for you is far better than a rich man who has everything you wanted in life.

Marrying a rich man is not a license to a ‘rich’ marriage. Look beyond the physical and let God guide you otherwise you’d trade your happiness for riches. I do not say you should marry a poor man but look beyond the money a man has.

2. Material items

Love isn’t induced or conditioned and any marriage built on the foundation of material items would collapse when there’s a famine of it.

Dear ladies, don’t think that because he buys you gift and all the things you need meant that he’s the right person for you. Gifts has the tendency to blind the eye.

If you proposal can be bought, then someone else too who has more may buy you off from him. Don’t auction your marital bliss for gift items. Grow up in material things and be contented with the little you have.

When you allow material things seem so special to you, you’re only doing yourself more harm now and in the future.

3. Attention

That he calls often, comes around when you need him, keeps your company, you enjoy his presence or he becomes the model of your dream man; doesn’t guarantee you a happy home. He could change all of a sudden when he’s got what he wanted. Don’t let a man buy you off through false care and attention. Although, attention is needed in a relationship but it should not be a determining factor in accepting a man’s proposal. Raise your standard and values above ephemeral things that can be easily bought off. You need more than attention (physical beauty) to get the right partner. 4. Pursuing God

The crucial point of getting the right partner is to first get it right with God. When you place your emotions in God’s hand, it would take a man who’s sold out to Him to get your heart.

How do you esteem God in your life? Does He become number one or the last thing you could ever think of? A major point of reference or your last resort?

To be happily married is to pursue God more than anything while you’re single. When you do this, only a real man who loves God would be able to get your heart owing to the fact that you know and you’re convinced that he’s the right one.
If you don’t seek after God, do not expect a man that’s sold out to God to locate you except he goes carnal.

What’s your price tag ladies? Isaac indirectly paid the price to get Rebecca. Don’t let money, material things, false care and attention to be a platform of accessing your heart. Any foundation that’s not built on God cannot guarantee you a successful marriage. Let God be the major factor that would make a man consider you for a serious relationship, it may look absurd but it’s the best bet.

THE MYSTERIES BEHIND FEELINGS

Why do emotional attraction becomes so intense amongst people who share intimacy, especially the opposite sex when they’re not married?

Unarguably, all relationship between the opposite sex, especially a love relationship started off on the basis of feelings. You cannot be in a relationship with someone you don’t feel anything towards.

What attracted A to B may not be the same thing that attracted B to A but feelings is the foundation of all love relationship. As an unseen force, feelings is capable of setting lives on fire depending on how and to what it is channeled.
Except you live by the rules, your feelings has the capacity of influencing your life negatively in your relationship with the opposite sex. And if you wouldn’t be a slave to your feelings (emotions), you need to know these mysteries.

1. When care isn’t taken, feelings will become so intense and lead to sexual immoralities

Since it works with the force of attraction, mutual feelings with the opposite sex has every tendency to lead to sexual immoralities when you break the law.

This is often the case with those who entered into relationship within weeks and ended up in bed. The more you fan the flames of feelings, the intense it becomes and as intense it is, it has the ability to burn the cord of purity leaving ashes when the deed has been done.

2. Feelings has a strong force of attraction to bind two people together who are in a relationship when it’s mutual

Feelings deals with your emotions or lies within your emotion. A relationship can be sustained for long when there’s mutual feeling between the parties involved.

It has no respect for age or status. A married man and a single lady can share mutual feelings, likewise an older lady and a younger man can be in a relationship when feelings is mutual.

3. Feelings can last for as long as you sustain its flow

Fire keeps burning for as long as you fuel it, the same goes with your feelings.
Frequent communication such as chatting or phone conversation sustains the flow of feelings. When you talk or see often, there’s a greater influence your feelings will have on you two if it’s the major drive in your relationship.

Hence, frequent communication is the fuel that sustains the tempo at which feelings burns in your relationship. The more you talk/see, the stronger your feelings become.

4. Love isn’t dependent on feelings because feelings are temporal and can change when it is faced with the realities of life

Oftentimes, a lot of people mistaken love with feelings. Feelings isn’t love. Love is an intentional act to be committed to the welfare of whom you love, meanwhile, feelings is an emotional force of attraction that’s dependent on circumstance. Sometimes when you choose to love someone, they might not have anything that got you attracted to them but feelings will have a condition why it’s attached to the person it’s directed to.

5. Feelings will cause you sleepless night but when you give it time, you’ll discover that it lacks depth

Have you ever imagined the weird things people do when they’re under the influence of feelings? They’ll chat into the wee hours of the night when they have something important to do the next day.

But overtime when it wanes, you’ll discover that it’s no longer what it use to be.

6. When feelings is directed towards a particular object in your partner’s body, it breeds lust which then leads to sin when the act is carried out

Some people sometimes feel like having sex, some feel like ‘romancing’ who some could feel like having an erotic conversations. All of these are directed towards a cause. When it’s carried out, it leads to sin. Feelings can also be said to be a strong desire in you to do a thing which might be ungodly especially when you’re not married.

7. When soul tie is created, feelings becomes difficult to break but when communication is lacking, it wanes gradually but smokes once in a while

Show me a man or woman that has had their souls knitted together and I’ll tell you it’ll be quite difficult to knock off the feelings they once had.

As long as they do not communicate, the feelings would wane but when conversation becomes more intimate, the flames of feelings would resurface and take them back to where they had stopped.

This is why people still have an attraction for their ex no matter how separated they must have been. The years of separation doesn’t matter once the spark of communication had be ignited, they’ll set the ball rolling.

The only way not to return to your vomit which feelings must have caused is that you take the bull by the horn – discipline and burn off the bridge of communication. The reason why you’d still commit premarital sex or immoralities with your boyfriend or girlfriend is because you’re still creating an avenue to awaken the flames of feelings.

Check what feelings must have led you to do in the past and make amends before it drags you back. It doesn’t matter if you’re anointed or wiser, live by the rules!

TIPS

Life doesn't give you what you desire all the time, but what you determine to posses.
A good and successful marriage is not a product of wishing, it's a thing you work for.
Becoming the right person isn't dreamt, its a personality you work to develop.

WHO TO MARRY: MYSTERY OF TIMING

“To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven” – Ecclesiastes 3:1

Have you ever imagined what would be said of a five months old baby that walks before it crawl in life?
Life is all about timing, doing the right things at the right time gives life order and balance. There’s a time to bother oneself about whom to marry and there’s a time you don’t have to bother yourself about whom to marry.
Quite a lot of youth, especially singles who should be busy with their lives and destiny discovery are wasting their lives in casual relationships. Going from Peter to Paul, Janet to Jennifer in search of the right partner.
Due to this wrong mindset, many had met more than what they bargained for and are left with a negative experience in life. Whether you believe it or not or you’d accept it, doing the right thing at the wrong time still makes it wrong. It is only when you do the right thing at the right time that makes it right.
How would you know the wrong time and the right time to seek for whom to marry?

1. It is wrong to seek for whom to marry when you’re underage
Teenagers or singles who are still spoon fed by their parents need not to bother themselves with whom to marry. You may disagree but that’s the truth.

Why should you be bothered about whom to marry when you’re still depending on your parent or on others for virtually all that you need? Curiosity kills the unwise cat. There’s no how a teenager can be so wise and experienced to know how to fare well in a love relationship.

The timing isn’t right to go into a relationship when you haven’t gotten a life (purpose) worth living for. Many don’t know why they exist or the reasons behind their existence, yet they want to look for the potential spouse.

Lack of purpose discovery or facing life with the right perspective is the reason why many became victims of relationship issues. Discover yourself. Face your academics squarely or vocation. But when you allow comparative analysis to get into your head, you’ll do what others are doing and experience what they’re facing.

2. The timing is wrong to look for whom to marry when you’re immature
Maturity has nothing to do with age! Some people are boys with men’s appearance while some are girls with the appearance of a woman.
How would you recognize them? Emotionally, spiritually, financially and mentally they are immature. It’s a big shame on you when you don’t know how to control your temper or tolerate the opposite sex based on their framework. How would you cope with your partner?

Most issues in life has their root in the spiritual. If they still wake you up to pray, force you to pray or coerce you to be serious spiritually, don’t go near looking for whom to marry. The largest part of marriage isn’t all about romance, it’s about facing the realities of life that needed spiritual, financial and mental approach.

If the bulk of the decision you make are still influenced by others, then you’re a weakling who would be driven by the third party in marriage. Grow up and be responsible!

How about handling financial responsibilities? Do you have a source of income or other means to make legit money? If you can’t feed yourself well and at least one or two persons, don’t worry yourself about whom to marry lest you live a frustrated life due to your inability to put food on the table, most especially as a man.

3. It’s wrong to seek for whom to marry when in two or five years time marriage won’t be in your agenda
Many people believe that going into a relationship would help them to know the right person or how the opposite sex behaves, but that’s a distorted philosophy.
You can’t know the right shoe for you by testing every shoe but you’d only know the right one by knowing your size and carefully look out for the type, color and size that fits into your life and not just your dress or situation. This also applies to finding the right partner.
Why should you be in a relationship thinking it would end in marriage when you’re not even sure of your life and the fate of the relationship? It’s a sheer waste of time, resources and productive years that could have been channeled into something more fruitful.

There’s time for everything under the heavens. Know the right time to find the right partner and the time not to bother yourself with the quest.

And lest I forget, two things are involved in finding whom to marry. You can either trust in the Lord with all your heart in knowing whom to marry or you lean on your own understanding to find who suits you. The latter may take time but it’s the best and the former is usually quick but detrimental to your life.

Right timing is everything about life. Discover your right time lest you waste away before the right time comes.

I’m Single: Is It A Blessing Or A Curse?

Life is a matter of choice, what you do with it today determines whether you’d be blessed or cursed or whether you’d become a blessing to your generation or a curse to them.
Meanwhile, the best stage of life that determines the kind of impact you will make in life is your single years. Except by the grace of God, you may not be able to correct the mistake of the past at old age.
Now that you’re single, is it becoming a blessing to you or it’s doing more harm to your life and generation? The greatness of a man is not determined by his married life, it’s dependent on the kind of foundation he built while single. Here’s how your singlehood will become a curse.

1. You are engaging in social vices
Because the glory of the young men is their strength, many have channeled their strengths to social vices. The likes of cultism, kidnapping, terrorism, hooliganism, theft and other social vices will make your life a curse to your generation and the society. The more you indulge in any of these, the more regret you experience in life. Why would you live your life in regrets when you can be a blessing to your generation? 2. Indulging in premarital sex
Due to the rage of their hormones and youthful exuberance, many singles are living a cursed life by moving from one lady or man to another. If their adventures were to be limited to fun it would have been better, but little did they know that they’re sowing wild oats that would destroy their destinies and future. Your life cannot be a blessing to your generation or to yourself when you have fragmented it on the bed of immoralities except you desist from it now.

3. Channeling your energy to the wrong cause
Show me a youth that put so much of his or her efforts into chasing shadows and I’ll show you the fate of his life in the future. I'm Single: Is It A Blessing Or A Curse?

The likes of gambling, betting, cyber crime, 419ner, dating married men and the likes are the wrong courses that many singles find themselves in. How would your life be a blessing when you have wasted it on the cause that won’t yield any positive impact on your generation?

It’s never late to chart a new course in life today if you’re ready to take the right step. Remember, a house built on a wrong foundation, regardless of its cost, design and quality is nothing but a disaster awaiting to manifest in the future. Meanwhile, your single years would be a blessing when you…

1. Remember your creator
What does that mean? It implies that you acknowledge God in the days of your youth. Seek Him with the best part of your life rather than give Him your left over at old age. Those who remember their creator in the days of their youths are those who live their life accountable to God. They’d rather live for Him than to live for self or the society and they will be a blessing to themselves and generation…ask Adolf Hilter and Martin Luther and a host of others.

2. Discover purpose
Nothing can undermine the greatness of a youth who has discovered his purpose in life. He already knows why he’s here and he’s doing something positive about it.

Having this kind of singles in our generation is to have a world where people are living a fulfilling life with no struggle or awaiting the government to help them. When you discover your purpose and you’re pursuing its fulfillment, you’ll be a blessing to yourself, generation and people around you.

3. Prepare for the married life
Rather than live a cursed life by sampling everything in skirt or receiving the wild seed of every Tom, Dick and Harry; your life will be a blessing when you utilize your single years to prepare adequately for the married life.

The single years is not a time to pursue premarital sex, it’s a time to build discipline on how to maintain marital sex. It’s not a time to use what your mama gave you to get what you want, it’s a time to honor God with your body.

Your life becomes a blessing to whomsoever you marry when you adequately prepare for the married life while you’re still single rather than mess it up on temporary pleasure.

What kind of life can it be said of you that you’re living now? Be honest with yourself and determine whether you’re a blessing or a curse to your generation. It’s never too late to make amends now when you choose the right path to tread. Remember, every works will be brought to judgment whether good or bad and it’s better to receive the rewards of living a blessed life than to be punished for living a cursed life.

By Mayowa Adeniyi