Truth#14

  Evil Thrives in the Absence of Love

Why is the world we live in filled with crime stories, divorce, domestic abuse, illicit sex, infidelity, terrorism, killings, racism, human trafficking, kidnappings, fraud, oppression, theft, greed, rape,

covetousness and other evils you can think of? Do we need good governance or a new order to solve all these problems?
The conclusion of the matter is that the absence of love brings evil.

Where there is no love, evil thrives. When there is no love, it is easy for the devil to sow seeds of hatred, suspicion, ill feelings, bitterness, enmity and discord. Watch your heart, which seed do you allow to germinate in it?

You need love to make your life better and we need love to make our world better. If everyone of us can love each other as ourselves, the world will be in a much better place.

It is not a new religion, political party or religious movement we need; all that we need is to allow love buy a permanent place in our lives as individuals.
For as long as we spread hate, evil will never cease to thrive in the society and in the family. Let men and women love God so that they can love their neighbours as
themselves.
It is when you love God that you can express His love and anywhere the love of God dwells, darkness, evil or any form of wickedness can never thrive in such a place.

               #Personal Evaluation#

• Is love present in my heart?

                         Truth#13
                    Love is a Person
  
Did you know that?

Love is an expression of who you are to others around you. If what is inside of you is evil, you cannot fake good for too long before the evil will manifest in you. The person of God is love (1 John 4:8).
When what is on your inside is wicked, the love you would express will be wicked. Only a wicked man or woman will tolerate extramarital affair on purpose or for any reason.
Naturally, you do not have the capacity to love unless God reproduce His likeness in you through Christ.
When you love God and you have Him dwelling in you, it would be very
easy for you to express the person of God which is love.
You are not naturally wired to love like God, other forms of love can easily find expression in you but True love, the God-kind can only be expressed when the Holy Spirit has shed the love of God abroad your heart.
Who sits upon the throne of your life: God or the devil? You can quickly echo God but if someone steps on your toe now, what will be your outward and inward expression?
But when God lives in you, no matter the person or situation, you will easily express love from a pure heart. And this goes on with the saying that you cannot give what you do not have. It is natural or common to like a person but it is divine to express True Love.

                    *Personal Evaluation*
• Do I have God in me?

                               Truth#12

                    Love is the Greatest

You can be so wealthy,educated,influential or highly anointed but if you lack love, you are the most wretched person on earth.
‘’

1.)Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.
2.) And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing.
3.) And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body 
to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing’’ – 1 Corinthians 13:1-3.

No matter what you become in life, if you do not express love or have the capacity to express it, something is missing in your life. In fact, you cannot live a healthy life if you do not love others around you. Love’s way is the best and it is the greatest.
When love is present in your life or marriage, there is joy and peace; you may not be the wealthiest but you will be happy and comfortable in life. If love could find its way in politics, business, education and in the lives of individuals, our society would be much better than this but it is unfortunate that we have esteemed something else to be the greatest.

             Personal Evaluation

• What have I made to be the greatest in my life?

                                 Truth#11

Love Is Demonstrated in The Time of Adversity

Do you know that it is very possible to profess love to another person when times are good? But how many persons can hold onto their vows when times are bad?

  Jesus asked Peter thrice, ‘’Love you Me more than these?’’ The same Peter who said he will never deny Jesus denied Him when He was persecuted, not only that, he threw away all that Jesus had invested in his life and went back into his fishing business. 

How sad it was that Peter couldn’t love Jesus in the time of tribulation?
It is easy to love a person when they meet your needs or do what you want but it is
very difficult to still love them when they really offend you or when they are in trouble.
What kind of love do you express in various situations of life to the one you love?
True love does not change come rain or shine but the latter three is conditional and
selfish. In many marriages today, it is easy for newlyweds to exchange marital vows but few months into the marriage, they fail to mean their vows.
Paul elaborated the illimitable dimension of the love God has for us in Romans 8:35-39.
In times of troubles, problems, hunger, lack, want, no good clothes, danger, death and
so on; would you still express love to the one you profess love to? Would you still love God when He does not answer your prayer or He delays in giving you what you need?
Would you love your partner or friend when they walk in the valley of the shadow of death or you’re only a fair-weather friend?

                         Truth#10 
What You Cannot Change, Love Would

Have you ever imagined the dramatic transformation that took place in the life of Saul after he encountered the love of God? Imagine a persecutor becoming an Apostle. Imagine a murderer becoming a preacher of the Gospel he earlier condemned. This can only happen through love. The love that changes a man or woman is not the Eros, Storge or Phileo love; it is Agape. You cannot change anyone with these three kinds of love previously mentioned. In fact, feelings can never change anyone, likewise lust and infatuation. Due to ignorance, many believe when they marry a person, they will change or their carnal love will make them change. No! A colleague of mine at work shared the conversion story of a great man of God, how that a girl insistently told him about Jesus and he drove her away for the three days that she came. But on the third day, beside his sick bed as he was diagnosed of an incurable tuberculosis, the lady wept bitterly and implored him to accept Jesus and he was touched

 ‘’You cannot force anyone to do what you want them to do but when you love them with the love of God, a day will come that in their subconscious mind that they will manifest the change you want’’ 

 The love that changes a man or woman is not the Eros, Storge or Phileo love; it is Agape. You cannot change anyone with these three kinds of love previously mentioned. In fact, feelings can never change anyone, likewise lust and infatuation. Due to ignorance, many believe when they marry a person, they will change or their carnal love will make them change. No! A colleague of mine at work shared the conversion story of a great man of God, how that a girl insistently told him about Jesus and he drove her away for the three days that she came. But on the third day, beside his sick bed as he was diagnosed of an incurable tuberculosis, the lady wept bitterly and implored him to accept Jesus and he was touched in his soul in spite of how harsh he had treated her. Reluctantly, he agreed to accept Him but the girl was happy and gave him a Bible. This was how David Yonggi-Cho, the man who had the largest congregation in South Korea gave his life to Christ. The love that changes is divine, patient and it tolerates. Only those who have encountered the love of God can express True love. It is the love that drives the lover to his knees and agonizes for the soul of the loved till changes manifest in their life. It is the love that acts as a fool so that the loved can become wise and restored. I also remembered a real story I heard in church. A middle-aged woman was living with a native doctor who sought every means of attacking her because of the power of God in her life. He tried her in the spirit realm but failed and he concluded to go physical by getting her angry. One day, the man came out of his room and saw her child playing in the lobby, he deliberately gave her a slap and she cried to her mother. The woman came out, went on her knees to apologize to him. Seeing this that she had done, he dashed into his room and wept and as a result of that, he gave his life to Christ in the long run. Do you have this kind of love that doesn’t get angry if it was offended? It is only possible when you have encountered the love of God.
           Self examination •
Is my love accommodating or selective?

What Does Your Man Really Need?

If you are a lady and you are in relationship with a man, or you're not, or you're already married to him, please grab a seat to learn one or two things from this write up.

God created man in His own image and likeness, likewise women. He made him to be a little lower than the angels, and crowned him with glory and honor. And at a point he discovered that it is not good that he should be alone, and he met this need.

Dear woman please hear this, if you understand a man's need, and meet it, he will love you with the whole of his life, especially if you are married to the right man.

You can't do the following things for the wrong man and meet his needs. But if you are married to the right man who loves you so much, consider yourself the luckiest woman on earth, and please don't take him for granted. Many women aren't these lucky to have such men.

Now, let's go straight to the first point.

NUMBER ONE.

He needs peace of mind.

As a woman, since men are created to be a provider, and he is a logical thinker, he has so many things boggling his mind that he needs a calm to unwind.

If you don't understand how to create a peaceful environment for a man, he'll look for peace elsewhere.

I know that women tends to be reactive. As e dey pain dem, naso dem go react. But hey, if you treat a man this way every time, he'll prefer to stay late at work, hang out with the boys or drink himself to stupor at night so that he would  become deaf to your rantings when he comes home.

Why am I saying this? Do not be a woman who nags life out of a man. The Bible even said it is better to dwell in the corner of the house top than with a brawling woman in a wide house.

King Solomon repeated this statement three times (Prov. 21:9, 19, 25:24), who knows if that's why he had so many wives and concubines.

Men loves women who do not increase their pressure.

An average and serious man is thinking of how to make life comfortable for himself and his family, but when you increase the frustration that life throws at him, you will sell him off to a mistress or secretary who helps him to unburden his mind.

As a woman, know when to discuss pressing issues with him, don't talk about bills when he hasn't settle his mind after a long day at work. Don't deprive him of sex when he needs it because of something he's yet to provide for you or the children (for married folks only).

Don't be a troublesome woman, be a woman that gives him peace of mind, and do not add to the troubles of his life.

NUMBER TWO.

He need you to respect him.

Do you know that the greatest need of a man is not sex? Please read that again. A man's greatest need is not sex but respect.

Are you shocked?

A man can have sex with a woman, and does not love her. But I have never seen a man who doesn't love a woman that gives him so much respect. He can wait until the wedding night if she's the type that respect him before he have sex with her.

Treat a man the way he deserves to be treated, and you'd bring out the baby in him.

Men loves to be in charge. Men loves to be treated as a king. Men have ego, and a wise woman will pamper it rather than bruise it through her ignorance or negligence.

Respect isn't about kneeling down and to carry the food on your head for him to eat. Respect isn't about saying "I will submit to you".

Respect to a man means that you don't take him for granted, you value his opinion and do what he tells you.

In short, the summary of respect to a man is obedience.

The difference between Vashti and Esther is that one respected (obeyed) her husband and the other disgraced her husband in front of his friends.

Do you know why the scripture commanded wives to submit to their husband?

Because women lead independent lives, especially first borns and the industrious ones; for them to submit to their husband will be a tough battle because they have independently made decisions and embark on projects without any help from a male figure in their lives.

However, it is very easy for a woman to submit to the right man who wouldn't treat her like a slave, but would love her.

An ugly woman who respects a man will get his attention than a beautiful woman who lacks respect. Also add other things like making good food, good sex and so on.

NUMBER THREE.

He needs a Help meet

Why did you think God said it is not good for a man to be alone and that he will make him a help meet?

A help meet isn't a woman that will give him a mind-blowing sex, prepare a finger-licking meal or take care of his house; a help meet is a woman that can fill in the gap that exists in his life. This is why some refer women as a man's "better half".

All of these are secondary.

Primarily, he needs a woman who can help him fulfill his divine purpose, dreams and visions. He needs a woman who they can both brainstorm ideas. He needs a woman that can cover him and support him.

This is why Adam said the woman is his bone of his bones and the flesh of his flesh. Do you know what that means?

Bone talks about support while flesh talks about covering.

He needs a woman that would encourage him when others give up on him. He needs a woman that can stand behind and beside him when his fears seems greater than his faith.

He needs a woman that would give him 4W's and only a help meet has God endowed with the potentials to do these: warmth, wrestle, walk, and work with him.

NUMBER FOUR

Other secondary needs of a man includes a teachable woman who can give him good food, sex and look good for him. This is why you should dress well to look good for him, prepare good food for him or learn if you don't know how, and learn to satisfy him in bed.

Just be teachable.

And if you don't like sex, please don't marry. You don't need to know how sex feels before or outside marriage, the right man will be patient enough to teach you the ABC's of sex in marriage.

Don't listen to those who want it before marriage. They are thieves and hirelings.

They want to taste without buying, they want to enjoy without doing the needful. Call such men a thief, and don't be emotional about it.

What other things does a man needs that I didn't mention? Please share your thoughts so others can learn from you.

© Adeniyi Tim Oluwamayowa 2019

                                 Truth#9

It Is Not Love If You Can Only Accept a Perfect Person
Is there really a perfect person? I mean someone who has no flaws, weaknesses,
shortcomings or imperfections? But Job had this testimony.

The truth is that we were all born with several weaknesses
and are wired with lots of imperfections, yet many find
themselves in marriage without having worked on these.
Love makes an imperfect person to be perfect over time. If you only love what is perfect
about him or her, what will happen when you discover their imperfections? Love accepts
everyone regardless of their imperfections. It is not love if you only accept the good
things about your friend or spouse, love accepts a person entirely – the good, the bad
and ugly in them.
Don’t ever think you would have a perfect spouse. Everyone can act been perfect in their
outlook but when you start living with them, you will discover many things that would
make them look entirely different from who you use to know. Make room for their flaws
and imperfections so that when you discover it, they will still be the one you love, come
rain or shine.
Remember, while we were yet sinners (imperfect, sinful, disobedient, rebellious), God
commends His love towards us and Christ died for us.

Personal Test
• Do I love my partner only for the good things I know about them?

HIS LOVE AS A SHEPHERD

Jesus as a good shepherd gave  His life for the Sheep. The measure of love He bestowed upon us,  made Him sacrifice His life for us. 

In relationship, your love towards one another should entails one of the dimensions of love,  which is SACRIFIES

Sacrifice is you forgoing your comfort or going extra miles to preserve love.  I.e to demonstrate your worth for Him/Her despite the challenges you are encountering.

God's matchless love towards us, made Him send His only begotten son for our salvation. 

His love towards us as a shepherd,  is unquantify.  Even before we were formed in our Mother's womb,  He knows us. 

John10:14.

Jesus expect you to express His love to one another,  the way He showered it on us. 

The scripture gave us a detail story regards the shepherd taking care of the sheep on a field, and He noticed that one was missing out of the 100 sheep and was left with 99 sheep.  He left the 99 sheep and went out looking for that missing sheep. 

Jesus expect you to look out for one another regardless what's missing in Him/Her.

He never looked at how stubborn or disobedient the sheep was,  but HE took it upon Himself to look  out for the missing one. 

Claiming that you love Him /Her shouldn't be express with mere mouth,  you should correct in love and look out for one another at all times. What he or she does might be hurting, painful or might have put you through stress in one aspect of the other, but still take your ground and express that  shepherd love.

 David was a shepherd,  and he also took it upon himself to protect his father's flocks from wild animal. Even when he encountered one of the wild animal.

I don't know those wild animals planning to break through the boundary of your home or relationship,  why dont you take your ground as a shepherd for Christ,  and fight in love. 

Considering our background, we are not trained the same way.  But it only takes the exact love of the shepherd to accept one another and relate with the mind to forgive in love. 

©Olugbenga Babafemi T

DIMENSIONS OF LOVE

A more excellent way to prosper is to do things in love..
 Love never fails,  whosoever is connected to love is immune from failure .
When you love the Lord with all your life,  you can never fail..Ephesian 3:18
Love is not generic, but it has dimension...
There is a dimension you love God and another person prayer request is working for your greatness.. 
Some people when they are not praying,  their relationship with God is praying.
There are four dimension in loving God:
1.) PASSION
True love is express in passion,  pursue is express in passion.  God is not afraid to express His love for man.  The Bible said what is man,  that you are mindful of him.
Jesus came as proof of His love..
When you love God,  it will be express in your passion and desperation to go extra Miles for HIM.
2.) COMMITMENT
True love is express in commitment. There are times desires die,  but commitment keep it.  The stay power, ability to stay and remain.  Your commitment is tested when nothing favourable is there,  despite all you are still staying. When God is silence,  God is saying something. Patience is a virtue that forces deception to be revealed.
The staying power is the work for manifestation.
3.) PLEASURE
In this kingdom there is joy,  peace,  happiness,  so your life cannot be circle of pain.  One day you should love God and the pleasure to acknowledge His faithfulness should fill your heart.
Fruitfulness is a good index to explain pleasure. The ability of doing things for Him with joy,  and you can't fathom what's triggering that in you.
4.) SACRIFICE
The forgoing of comfort to preserve love,  to demonstrate worth. Loving God,  you must be committed and passionate about Him.  "Greater love no man than this,  that He lay down his life". Giving all to HIM,  despite you are not getting a response from HIM yet..
Despite HE bless you greatly with something big,  you still gave it back to Him.  Not that you don't need them,  but you understood the dimension of love HE had for Him giving us is only son...

Do you really love God? The level you want to get to in life,  is determined by the UNSHAMEABLED LOVE you have for HIM..
You might have prayed all prayers and you are not getting result,  why don't you introduce the dimensions of love in your daily living..

Praye point :
Please Lord,  help me to love you unashameably and fill my life with your endless love.

Please,  give me that true love you showered,  just for me to be save..

Jesus no matter what it will cost me,please give me the grace to stay patiently in the waiting room till you are ready for me.

Jesus, Help me not to rush out of your presence,  until I'm full till the brime .. The apostles never rushed out of the upper room until they were filled..

2 Indisputable Reasons Why People Cheat in Relationship or Marriage and its Solutions

Men cheats. Women cheats also. It's not about who does it more or less, it's about preventing this from happening to you or someone you love. Cheating seems to be one of those unforgivable issues in marriage.

According to survey, three major issues that has been known to be the most threatening matter to issues in marriage are financial challenges, sexual and third party influence.

Money matters can be sorted out when you are able to make more money or you have a partner who is understanding and is contented.

Third party influence can be dealt with when you apply the right principle, you taste every advise before you swallow it hook, line and sinker and you divorce proof your marriage through the external means with which it can comes from.

But on the matter of sex, it's a big threat in itself. It's either one partner is not being satisfied and goes outside to get more or the other complains of it being too much and the dissatisfied partner seeks solace elsewhere.

All these can still be sorted out when you get a good counselor or sex therapist to counsel you two but the major challenge with illicit sex, why people cheat without blackmailing any gender is tied to FAMILIARITY and the MONOTONOUS VIEW of staying with one partner for the rest of your life.

Let me illustrate this better.

Do you know that you'd get bored with eating the same chocolate over and over for many years? It'll lose its flavor and freshness in your taste because your body is used to it.

It is on this premise that many consider cheating or justify it to be right and some women have been made to believe that men are polygamous in nature...but in the beginning, it was not so.

Whether you are a man on the pulpit or you sit on the pew, being religious doesn't solve this major issue behind cheating but that you embrace self control, be determined, be contented, count the cost and possess a transformed mindset.

But the deception of the devil through worldly philosophy is to make you believe that the grass is greener at the other end. And the truth is that all penis and vagina are the same. The sizes and shapes may differ but it's the same pleasure they give.

The body may be different, you might get a different style other than that which your partner can give you, the moaning can be louder or the experience different but in the real sense, you don't go beyond cloud nine.

Lack of contentment will make you feel its better outside. Your friends might make you feel there's an added advantage when you go extra but the consequence is always regrettable.

Only a fool make a mock of sin.

You can be educated in human wisdom but yet remain a fool when it comes to extramarital sex. Scientists do not have the right fact about sex. Worldly philosophers are not the absolute authority over sex as to where it can be done but God who created man and his instinct to have sex.

The only way to curb this matter of illicit sex which can affect anyone is to have the fear of God. The fear of God makes you to run away from the appearance of evil, embrace self-control, stay faithful and influences your mindset.

Yes it is true that having sex with one partner can be boring in the long run, but is it boring to take water everyday for the rest of your life? Inasmuch as taking soda or eating junks is consequential to your health, cheating is very dangerous to your life and to your generation yet unborn.

Do you know that a man can have a beautiful wife and still be pulling down the pant of their house help? A woman can have a good husband, who's rich and handsome but the gate man is going in and out of her Holy of holiest without oga’s knowing. Lack of contentment and communication is the problem.

If he or she is not doing it well, especially in marriage, politely discuss about it and how you want to enjoy it.

Illicit sex (premarital or extramarital) allows the devil to invade lives and destroy marital destinies. Illegitimate children who lack adequate parental upbringing are products of extramarital sex amidst other terrible things it causes.

Count the cost before you think it's a profitable affair. You might escape the consequences but your unborn generation will not. In fact you cannot escape what they call the law of Karma because whoever breaks the hedge, the serpent shall bite.

Have you made up your mind to stay faithful to your partner come what may or you think playing away matches is permissible? It's a personal matter that you must settle because the devil or the society will make you see one thousand and one logical reasons why you can cheat on your spouse.

See, her pointed breast will become flaccid one day. His six packs abs may end up becoming a potbelly. You just have to be contented.

That a thing is logical does not mean it's true according to God's standard. Abraham dabble into extramarital affair and it cost his generation unborn. David ventured into it and it ruined his flawless walk with God. Solomon became an icon on this matter and his heart was turned away from God.

Before you consider cheating as an option in marriage or prior to it, count the cost, think on the consequences and what it would do to you.

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© Oluwamayowa Adeniyi 2019

                        Truth#8

      You Need God to Express Love

No man can express true love without having encountered the true God personally.

Do we need to know God intimately before we express lust? Do we need to study the Bible to know what infatuation is all about? Why do we need to be taught how to love if it was in our inherent human nature?

Love is not inbuilt, you can only exhibit a minute fraction of it. But to express love that is unconditional, selfless and impartial, you need to know God, not through the lens of religion but through Jesus. Being morally kind is different from expressing love. It takes true love to be selfless, sacrificial and give without expecting a payback.

How do I know God?

Going to church regularly or practising any religion does not mean you know God.

What shows that you know God is a reflection of Christ in you. No one knows God by reading literatures, it is your encounter with Jesus that shows that you know God.

When you have an encounter with Jesus, it will show in your love life. To know God
intimately, you must give your whole heart to Him through absolute surrender.
When your heart belongs to Him, He will give you His own heart in exchange so that you can love and live like Him.

If you have not accepted Jesus into your life as your Lord and Saviour, it would be very
difficult or practically impossible for you to express the God kind of love.
You do not know God through religion or frequenting church programs, you know God through Jesus because Jesus is the Way to God. There are several ways but He is the
only way. Jesus is the Truth you need to know about God.

Lots of ‘truths’ had been told about the existence of God. Several religions and cults call Him different names but Jesus is God in human form. He came to the earth as a man to model the love of God to mankind so that whosoever believes in Him would not perish but have everlasting life.

Jesus is the Life God gives to those who come to Him through Him. This life includes Agape love, peace, good health, victory over sin, the flesh, Satan and so many things. If you do not know God, you cannot express His kind of love. If you do not know Jesus intimately, you cannot experience the love of God and if you do not have the Holy Spirit
in you, you cannot express True Love.

           ¤Personal Evaluation¤
• Do I know God experientially or religiously?

 Thing That Makes Marriage Sweet
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Have you heard from few married couples who told you their experience about marriage, especially those who said marriage is sweet?
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Those who had bad marital experiences are those who would tell you negative things about marriage. But those who got it right are better listened to so that you can know what they did to enjoy their marriage.
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In this article, I will by His grace show you one thing that makes marriage beautiful, sweet and enjoyable. Do you look forward to this kind of marriage?
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But before then, know these...
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Marriage is sweet when you become the RIGHT PERSON, you MARRY THE RIGHT PERSON and you APPLY THE RIGHT PRINCIPLE.
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These are the first things you must get right for your marriage to be sweet. But more important than these is to DISCOVER GOD'S PURPOSE FOR YOUR LIFE.
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The beauty of marriage is not in having babies, going for romantic dinners and dates, enjoying sexual intimacy or leaving the married life; it is in having a purpose and pursuing it. Especially, knowing God's purpose for your life personally.
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God's primary purpose for marriage is for the fulfilling of His purpose on earth. Adam knew this purpose and the woman was made for that reason.
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Of what good would your marriage be in that you had babies, had sex when you wanted, lived the couples life, raised children, became parents and then grandparents before you exit this world? Are these all there is to becoming married?
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Men may tagged you to be fulfilled but such marriage is a colossal loss to the kingdom of God.
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Other things are secondary in marriage but God's purpose for your life is the main thing that makes you two experience a sweet marriage.
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The beauty of marriage is in the fulfilling of God's purpose for your lives and in your marriage. How good will it be for a marriage when the husband and wife pursue the same purpose of God for their lives?
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No wonder He says one would chase a thousand but two would chase ten thousand to flight!
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Is your marriage helping God against the mighty of the land? Is your marriage a threat to the kingdom of darkness? Are you both striving to see the establishment of the kingdom of God on earth or your marriage is just for nothing?

Dear singles, discover God's purpose for your life before you seek who to marry. You will marry wrong when you don't know God's purpose for your life. One of the easiest ways to know who you should not marry is when you have discovered His purpose for your life.

It is often said that, "Purpose before partner". Seek to know God's purpose for your life before you burden yourself about who to marry.

Why should you be anxious about getting married when you don't know why God has created you? Such kind of marriage will be boring, empty, dry and unfulfilling.

But imagine a kind of marriage where both the husband and wife are pursuing the same purpose of God for their lives. There's nothing as beautiful as been married to someone who understands God's purpose for your life and you're both heading in that direction.

It's frustrating to have a call of God upon your life and be married to someone who doesn't love to be married to men of God. It is unfulfilling when you know why God created you and you're in a relationship with someone who doesn't know theirs.

The Holy Spirit said through Paul that you should not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. An unbeliever isn't just someone that doesn't believe in Jesus but someone who doesn't believe in God's purpose for your life.

The major form of compatibility checklist you must have aside knowing if they're genuine believers in Christ is to ascertain if you two are compatible purpose wise.

Ladies, never marry a man who hasn't discovered God's purpose for his life and he's fulfilling it. "I will become this, I will become that" is not as important as "I am doing this", "I have been doing that, which you are very sure of.

Many firebrand sisters lost their passion for God because they married men who were fire extinguishers.

Brothers, no matter how gifted and anointed a sister is, don't marry her if she's not going to be your help meet. But this would be impossible if you don't know why God created you.

Brothers, know why God created you. Sisters, discover God's purpose for your life. When you marry based on this understanding and you shun third-party influence and wrong principles, your marriage will be successful.

And no matter the storm, rain and flood; your marriage won't fail because it was founded upon a rock. Jesus said to Peter, on this rock will I build My church and the gates of hell won't prevail over it. That rock is understanding (revelation).

When you two are married based on the understanding of God's purpose for your lives and you're mutually pursuing it, your marriage will be sweet, beautiful and enjoyable, no matter the circumstance.

Marriage is sweet when you sing the same song, with the same tune and key. Marriage is beautiful when you pursue the same thing that drives you both. Marriage is enjoyable when two of you fight your battles together. Marriage is fun when you're a helper and she's a help meet.
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Marriage is sweet when you get it right, don't let anyone pollute your mind or give you a negative mindset about it.
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Do you look forward to having a sweet marriage? Discover God's purpose for your life now and be fulfilling it.
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© Oluwamayowa Adeniyi 2019

             Truth#7

Many Waters Cannot                       Quench Love

If your love for him or her can be quenched or extinguished, it shows that your love is limited, it cease to exist or will not stand the test of time. No matter what happens to love, many waters of adversity, pain or terrible past cannot quench it.
Let me share my personal experience about love so it doesn’t seem as if I’m saying what
I haven’t experienced.
Growing up in a family where domestic violence became a norm between mom and dad, which later led to their separation when I gained admission to the university was a very painful experience in my life that I will never forget. Need I to tell you several nights of fights that I’d have to call neighbours or our pastor to intervene? But after I have found the love of Godengrained in the fabrics of my soul, I forgave him and my heart yearns in love for my dad till date. Of a truth, it was not easy but Love made it lighter to bear.
But it is quite unfortunate that in many wedding ceremony, the love vow has been edited to mean, ‘’For better for stay, for worse for leave; in sickness, I manage but in health I stay; in riches, we enjoy but in poverty, I quit’’.
Are you going into marriage with this mentality? Remember, many waters cannot quench love. Can your love tank be emptied by pain, hurts or heart break?

         PERSONAL EVALUATION
• Is there anything that can stop me from loving my spouse or friend?

                                Truth#6      

    Love Can't Be Expressed by Carnal or                              Natural Minds

Do you know that you do not need to be taught how to express lust or infatuation? 

Every natural or carnal minded persons has the potentials of expressing Eros, Storge or Phileo kind of love but genuine love, I mean True love which is mostly referred to as Agape love cannot be expressed by mortal men.

True love is God’s nature imbued into men, whether partly or in a whole. But to express it, you need the Holy Spirit to teach you how to do so.
 A man who does not have the spirit of God in him cannot love his wife as Christ loved the church neither will a wife submit to her own husband if she is carnally or naturally driven.
You need the Holy Bible to learn about love, not social media, movies, celebrities or
preachers (or writers) who share their warped experiences because of their failed
relationships.
After learning from God’s word, then the Holy Spirit will teach you to express it if you yield to Him.
Howbeit, all you need to know about love is in the Bible, it is not in the world. Until you
mind is daily renewed and transformed by the word of God in the Bible, it will be
impossible for you to express the God kind of love.
Only a mind that is renewed can prove the dimension of love that is good, acceptable and perfect without imitating love patterns defined by the world system.

Personal Examination
• Have I renewed my mind with God’s word or I conform to everything the world throws at me?

                       

                      Truth#4

I Love You’ Is More Than a Sentence

Love is not in word or lip, it is in deed and in truth. Anyone can say ‘’I love you’’ but
not everyone can mean it. It is cheap to say ‘’I love you’’, but it is difficult to mean
it. ‘’I love you’’ contained three words that forms a sentence but the truth of love is that
it can never be captured in one statement (1 Cor. 13). There are several ‘’I love you’’ that
are products of feelings but very few are practical demonstration of selfless service that
stems out of a sincere motive.
A man can beat a woman mercilessly and afterwards, apologize, care for her and hug
her tightly and say ‘’I love you’’; but this doesn’t mean he won’t do it some other time
when he is angry. Is this love?
It is easy to profess love but it takes determination to express
it when your partner is unlovable. You may not need to
verbalize your love to your spouse or friend, it will be clearly
seen through your act of selfless, sacrificial and unconditional
love which you timely express to them.

 Personal Evaluation...
• Do I mean it when I say ‘’I love you’’ or I say it to have my way or tease others?

                               Truth#3
Love Is Unconditional, Sacrificial and Selfless
When there is a reason why you love, a day will come when there will be no reason
to love.
Love is unconditional but the likes of feelings, lust and infatuation has conditions
attached to it. ‘’I love her because she is’’; ‘’I love him because he makes me feel’’. These
are reasons why some people love and when those reasons cease to exist, their supposed
love will die a natural death.
Mind you, love is not about you, it is not about what you want
or what you want your partner to be; it is about giving yourself
to whom you love. If your claim of love is all about you, you
are selfish and self-centred. Love is not about what I can get,
it is about what I can give.
And if it does not cost you to love, you will never be committed to love.
However, love can only stand the test of time when it is selfless, sacrificial and
unconditional but feelings lacked these.

     Questions :
• Do I have conditions attached to why and who I love?
• Am I selfless or selfish in expressing love?
• Have I reasonably gone out of my way to express love?

       Truth about love

              Truth #2
 Love Is a Decision

Do you remember what God did to the whole world in the time of Noah? Do you
remember what led to His provocation?
Because the thoughts of the hearts of men were wicked and his imagination were
continually evil, He wiped out the first human race but in the New Testament, in spite of
man’s rebellion, He decided so much to love the world (John 3:16).
If your reason for not to love is as a result
of the evil (pain, hurts, heart break,
infidelity, wickedness) that had been
done to you in the past, you are not
obeying His command.
How are you different from the Gentiles who love those who love them and hate those
who hate them if your love is affected by a bad situation? I know it is not easy to do
but we all need His grace to do His will. And this is why you need God to express true
love.
Love is a decision. You must make up your mind to love that special person in your life
and family but when it comes to relationship, you can choose who you relate with. This
is not pride or class but carefulness. You must make the decision to love God and your
neighbour, come rain or shine because indecision makes you unstable. But be careful of
who you decide to love because every choice has its consequence.

Question?

• Have I decided to love or my love is conditional?

                14 Truths About Love
                You Must Never Forget.

                           Truth#1

 You Are Commanded to Love

Have you heard how people conclude that love is a feeling? ‘’I have some butterfly
feelings rumbling in my belly for him’’. ‘’She makes me feel high in love’’. My dear,
those are chemical reactions in your blood stream.
You are commanded to love whether you feel like or not, but feeling is subjective. You
can have high and low moments which could influence your love for a person or thing.
Is it when you are excited in the relationship that your
love tank will be full? Command one: Love your
neighbour as yourself! Command two: Husband, love
your wife! Command three: Love your enemies and pray
for those who despitefully use you. It takes love for a wife
to submit to her own husband. All these are commands
which has nothing to do with how you feel even when
the person to be loved is unworthy.
If how you feel determines your love, then you are in lust, infatuated or your love is only
conditioned to your emotion. Jesus said, love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul,
strength and might; then love your neighbour as yourself. How do you love yourself? I
believe you know it involves your spirit, soul and body.
After obeying His command, then you must decide.

             Personal evaluation Test.
• Do I obey the command to love or I express love based on my feelings?

©Adeniyi Oluwamayowa