by Mayowa Adeniyi
This is why I don't subscribe to boyfriend and girlfriend relationship because of their negative influence.“Iron sharpens iron; so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend” – Proverbs 27:17
Before now, I thought I had all the understanding of what friendship meant. But trust me, I’m not a novice in relationship, not because I write about it often, at least I have some empirical facts I had known over the years.
But there are many who do not understand what friendship meant. The likes of boyfriends or girlfriends is an understanding of what many thought to be the essence of friendship. Is that the whole purpose of having friends?
That scripture above made me to have a different understanding of having friends. It’s not new to me but the light of God’s word just dawn afresh on me relating to it.
Friendship is the condition of being friends with a person. They could be friends of the same-sex or opposite sex. The depth of friendship is more than being class mate, course mate, room mate or other types of ‘mate’ people have.
There’s a bond of intimacy in friendship, a knitting of souls just as it is with the case of David and Jonathan in the Bible. Friendship is often term as the spice of life but these days, it no longer seem true.
There are now friends for benefits, one party becomes the prey while the other becomes the host. Benefits in such friendship aren’t mutual and some believe that sex between opposite sex relationship is needed to keep the relationship aglow.
However, two things happen when you maintain friendship.
1. A good one sharpens your life
This is why I don't subscribe to boyfriend and girlfriend relationship because of their negative influence.A good friend doesn’t wear a wristband bearing ‘good’ on it but the influence they exert on your life makes them so. Many people do not know that there’s an influence your friend would have on you if you are weak willed. Whether consciously or unconsciously, you’ll imbibe some of their trait.
Good friends are rare to find because they won’t tell you what you want to hear but the truth that your life needs. They’re not timid to correct your errors because they are blunt and realistic.
They keep you on your toes and ensure that you’re up and doing. They’re not intimidated by your success but would ensure you don’t allow it get into your head. They exert positive influence on your life which you can attest to.
When they come into your life, they improve the condition of your life in virtually all aspect. With them, you’d learn one or two things that you’d never forget in your life.
Do you have such friend?
2. A bad one will ‘blunt’ your life
Lots of singles are into a relationship with a bad friend or friends. They don’t appear as evil but their influence on their life makes them so.
This is why I don't subscribe to boyfriend and girlfriend relationship because of their negative influence.Sometimes ago when I was in the university, I remember a room mate and course mate of mine who mingled with another friend of ours. One night, they came back from a party and they were drunk. The following night he came back to his senses, he was complaining bitterly how the guy was a bad influence in his life.
Many of the boyfriend and girlfriend relationship that many keep is a friendship that has ‘whet’ their sword. Once he comes into your life, he puts your life in a mess, makes you lose interest in the things of God unlike before or un-learn some of your good values. And the same thing happens to the female folks too.
Because of the emotional grip they have on your life, they are difficult to let go. The longer they stay, the terrible it becomes for you.
I can go on and on to give you their characteristic but I am sure now that a part of you is telling you about the one that’s exerting a bad influence on your life. Wouldn’t you rather take the bull by the horn to unfriend them before your life gets to an irreparable stage?
Take a cursory look at your present relationship, what influence does it have on your spiritual, mental, academical, financial, emotional or social life? If all you enjoy is social or emotional bliss while other departments of your life suffer a retrogress, then it calls for a rethink.
Any friend you have that doesn’t sharpen your countenance (life) would definitely blunt your life. This is why I don’t subscribe to boyfriend and girlfriend relationship because of their negative influence. It is not by how many friends you have, it’s about their quality and influence.
And if perhaps you find it difficult to get a good one, have you found a friend in Jesus? He’s everything you need in a friend – a confidant, a counselor, a comforter, name it! I treasure my friendship with Him than anyone.
I’d rather advice that you first make Him your friend because one alone with God is better than majority. He will make your life better than what you think you could ever become in life.
Remember, you are a reflection of the kind of friends you have. Show me your friend and I will tell you who you are.
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