by Mayowa Adeniyi
More often than not, many a relationship fails or do not last forever. Some that started with friendship do not last till marriage. Also, some engagement do not live to see the wedding day. Unfortunately, many marriages also break few or more years after they were formed.
Relationship is to be enjoyed by the partners involved. These can be achieved when a common interest and purpose is shared and pursued. However, trust, honesty and love are basic requirements in a relationship. Anything aside this, will make one party suffer an emotional pain. Why do people suffer heart break?
I remembered my first relationship after high school. I was high in spirit as a teenager. Naive as I was, I kept my heart to the relationship thinking it would last long. I met this young female teen in a religious gathering. We were of the same age bracket waiting to pursue a degree at the college. We served in the same department in church and we became good friends. Our parents knew each other and we usually spend time together. Unfortunately, when this older teenager came, he wooed this girl, ruined our relationship and it broke my heart. This led to my understanding of heart break and emotional pain and how to avoid it in my other relationships.
Heart break are dangerous to the mind and can be avoided in any relationship we find ourselves in. It symptoms are hurt, emotional pain, jilt, mental illness and being traumatic. To avoid it, I have carefully outlined below the measures you can take. When you do the following, your chances of becoming heart broken is minimal.
** AVOID PUTTING ALL YOUR EGGS IN ONE BASKET
Eggs are fragile objects that requires special care. They crack or break when a greater impact of force is applied to them. The human heart (soul) is very fragile. This is why it is important that you are very careful of whom you allow access into your heart lest they trample it and ruin you emotionally.
When we place so much hope or expectations in a relationship, our chances of becoming heart broken is high. Do not put all your heart into a relationship as if it is the final destination in your life. Many people do this and ended up emotionally traumatized. Always have it in mind, that you can be disappointed. Do not cage yourself in a relationship thinking you cannot have a better one outside it. Your knowledge of this will make you careful of whom you fall in love with and how you love them.
** SET BOUNDARIES
Boundaries are obstacles that prevents a space or building from been encroached. They act as barrier or obstacles that prevents unauthorized access into a place. Your heart must be barricaded in any relationship you go into. This does not mean you won’t be caring or concerned, but it places limit on how you do it. Lack of boundaries in a relationship will make you entrust all your heart, secrets or love to a partner you are not fully sure of his/her intentions. Guard against the frequency of your call, chat and the kind of words you use in expressing yourself, feelings, mood or describing your partner. Words like “dear”, “darling” or “sweetheart” creates affection for some people. Also, engaging in frequent chat or calls creates an avenue for emotional bonding.
** DEFINE THE RELATIONSHIP
Abuse is inevitable when the purpose of a thing cannot be ascertained. When you cannot define the purpose of a relationship or the basis for its creation, either of the party will abuse one another. Is the relationship purely casual, for friendship or having a view of marriage in the future? Even if it might lead to marriage, you need to define it. You don’t behave like married couples when you are still friends or partners. This is why engaging in premarital sex ruins a relationship.
** DON’T MAKE HIM/HER A PRIORITY
We often become disappointed in relationship when we make others a priority in our life. Since relationship is meant to be mutual, some people may care less about how you treat them while you are taking them to be your all. However, when you make them a priority in your life and they take you for minority, it will ruin your emotions. If he/she does not love, treat, care or display affection as much as you do, this shows that you are a minority in their life.
It is better not to have a broken heart than to repair a damaged one. A repaired heart cannot be like a new one. You need to guard against the kind of people that have access into your emotional life. Since the heart is fragile, you must be careful of the kind of relationship you have, avoid putting all your hopes in a relationship, set boundaries to secure your heart from been ruined and don’t make him/her a priority when you are only a minority in his/her life.
.jpeg)
No comments:
Post a Comment